I've missed you, I love you
by commander-cullywully
Summary: NSFW- Cullen/F!Trevelyan- Cullen's sleep is disturbed by an intruder during the night. Spoiler alert: It's Gwyn. Double spoiler alert: Smut ensues.


It was the first time in ages Cullen had been able to lay down and really get some sleep. Gwyn had been gone almost a month on what she had called a simple "sneak and grab" mission. She'd been very vague about the details before she'd left, if he was honest. Mainly because he'd promised Gwyn he would, he was finally getting some rest. Sleeping was always hard for him—too many things to get done, too many interruptions. He'd only been sleeping for two hours when he heard the loud slam of his office door below. Cullen instinctively reached for his sword resting nearby.

"Who's there?" Scout-" Before he could finish his sentence another thud echoed below. He could make out a faint mumbling below as he approached the ladder leading down to his office. His sword was pointing straight at Gwyn.

"Andraste's left tit, Cullen! What are you doing?" He helped Gwyn to her feet, then placed his sword in its normal resting place. Her clothes were soaking wet and her loose ponytail was dripping water all over the floor of his chamber.

"Maker's breath, Gwyn—what are you doing here? And why didn't you answer when I called out?" He hissed.

"I'm sorry, I was distracted by the fact I was trying to navigate your office in the dark! My boots are down in your office, by the way. Also- I didn't even know you were in here! Since the lanterns were out, I figured you were either in my quarters or the war room." She pulled her water-logged coat off her, a new puddle forming where she draped it. Groaning, she pulled the tie from her hair and ran her fingers through the soaking wet strands. Shaking his head, Cullen sighed.

"Maker's breath…" He rubbed his temples. "I was trying to get some sleep. Something _you _requested, if I remember correctly." Gwyn bit her lip and shivered slightly, rubbing her forearms to create enough heat.

"Forgive me. I had no intentions of interrupting your work, let alone your sleep. Honestly, I was just going to bed in my chambers when Vivienne told me I was…" she laughed, her breath appearing in the air between them. "She told me I was trailing in mud." He hurriedly retrieved an extra blanket from his bed and wrapped it around Gwyn's shoulders as she hugged herself.

"What _happened _to you? You're freezing!"

"Funny story, actually. You know that simple 'sneak and grab?' Well, it kind of turned into a 'run and fight for your life because there's a dragon' kind of mission." She noted the look of disapproval on his face. "Don't worry- we killed the dragon." She offered a small smile.

"I'm glad you're alright," he sighed. He pulled her close to him, her wet hair sticking to both of their faces. "A dragon," he breathed, deciding this was not the time to argue. "I'm just…why are you soaking wet?"

"Naturally, it rained the entire trek home—never let up once until we got near to Skyhold. Now I'm just freezing," she shivered in his arms. "Do you happen to have anything for me to change into?" She began to undo the clasps of her belt, draping her things next to her coat. Cullen glanced around his quarters, realizing he didn't have much in the way of extra clothing—most of his things had been moved to her room, if he was honest. His fur robes wouldn't do much good covering her. Sighing, he pulled the undershirt off his back and held it out to her.

She stared for a moment, opening her mouth to say something, but then settling into a small smirk. Cullen felt his face redden slightly as he rubbed the back of his neck. He'd never been remotely naked in front of Gwyn yet. Not that he hadn't thought about it, of course. When they'd sleep in the same room, she'd already be wearing the tan undershirt and hide breeches he had come to know the feel of so well. Carefully, Gwyn reached for his face, his chin, his neck. All parts of him she knew well, that she had memorized since she first became acquainted with them. Her fingertips lazily brushed his chest, causing his body to tense and Gwyn to withdraw her hand.

"Sorry," she mumbled, awkwardly rubbing her forearm.

"No, no. It's just," he sighed and set his undershirt on the bed, "your hands are freezing." He took her hands in his before placing them back on his skin, a smile on his face. She traced his collar bone, her fingertips leaving an almost icy trail, causing him to shudder from her gentle touch. A smile was growing on her lips as she gazed at him, her blue eyes bright.

Almost instinctively, he found his hands pushing her wet hair behind her ears and cupping her face gently. The moon was shining on her pale, freckled cheeks unlike anything he'd ever seen. One of her hands reached for his, the pad of her thumb brushing the top of them lightly, then her head turned just enough for her to kiss the bottom of his palm. He kissed her gently, forgetting that she'd hidden the dragon hunting from him, forgetting that moments like these could be interrupted.

He deepened the kiss, not wanting to be denied the few moments of pleasure this life was giving him. The kisses became feverish, more desperate between then. His hands frantically searched for skin underneath her layers of wet clothing sticking to her. A soft, guttural laugh escaped his throat as he fumbled with clasps and buttons. Her breath hitched as Cullen's fingers brushed against her, trailing from the collar of her shirt to her belly button. To him, this was all about committing every inch of her to memory.

Both of them worked to peel the wet layers from her body. He stopped when Gwyn winced before he could even help get her undershirt over her head. He gave her a questioning look, unsure where to go from here.

"It's okay," she whispered, helping him lift the material over her head, revealing a nasty burn on her back.

"Gwyn…" he whispered, concern growing.

"It's not as bad as it looks…really. I've already put the necessary poultices on it. It's just tender. I'll be fine." Cullen's eyes traveled to the rest of Gwyn's body. A large scar was left on her collar bone, one that she actively avoided discussing with others. His hands explored her skin, trying to take in every freckle, every curve that existed on her small frame. She took his mouth in hers, her lips soft and her kisses affectionate. He could feel her fingers gently running through his hair, the others gently caressing his hip. _This is a dream_. The thought was one he tried to push away, but remained in the back of his mind, nagging away. _A cruel, but wonderful dream_.

The thoughts are dismissed for the moment as Gwyn's hands travel to his breeches. A lump in his throat rose as her fingers worked to untie them. Before he knew it, she was gently pushing him back until he was on his bed. Her lips peppered affectionate kisses on his neck and collarbone, causing his heart to pound in his ears. She paused for a moment, her eyes gazing into his until he sat up to return her kisses. Smiling against her lips, his tongue explored her mouth. She wasn't sure what they were doing, she just needed to be close to him, to feel his skin on hers.

"Maker's breath, you're beautiful," he whispered breathlessly. Gwyn's fingers were wound in Cullen's golden hair, tugging gently enough to elicit a guttural noise from him. Just as quickly, she rolled over him, straddling him. As the two kissed passionately, his hands moved to her back to undo her breast band. His breath hitched as his gaze settled on the vision of her exposed over him. He needed her, wanted her to know exactly how he felt about her. He looked up at her, a smile on his face as his strong and calloused hands ran over her stomach, her sides, and the small of her back.

_One month_, Cullen thought. He hadn't seen her in weeks, but it felt like ages. Her room had once been filled with her scent, yet lately it smelled more like him. Every move he made, he'd wanted to show her exactly what she meant to him. He pressed kisses to her forehead, her eyelids, her cheeks, and her lips. His fingers brushed against her waistband, lightly teasing before pulling them down from her waist. She helped kick them off, laughing softly against his lips. He looked down at her, the moonlight shining on her skin and her lips upturned a wonderfully wicked smile. He was a lucky man.

He kissed the scar on her jawline, then moved to her neck—one of her favorite spots for his lips to be. The trail of kisses moved downwards, to the scar on her collarbone, then to her chest. His hands instinctively moved to her breasts, cupping them gently. Gwyn elicited a happy sigh just as he began to lower his lips to her hardened nipples. He planted more kisses on her stomach, until he moved just enough that Gwyn was reaching to push her smallclothes off her waist. As she moved to kick them off, Cullen worked to remove his own underclothes. His lips hungrily met hers, causing a moan to escape as she felt his erection straining against her leg. It'd been so long since he felt this way with anyone, let alone been physical with another person. He paused, looking up at her, his hand cupping her face.

"We don't have to, if…if-" he faltered, his eyes looking away out of fear. She pulled his chin towards him, looking into his amber eyes with a smile on her face.

"I _want _to. If I didn't, I would've stopped you ages ago." She pressed another kiss to his lips, then paused. "Do _you _want me to stop?" She shifted slightly in order to move off of him, her face turning a deep shade of red. "I…I mean, it's okay if you do. We can…" She was stammering now, covering herself, her body becoming smaller. Realizing she'd misunderstood him completely, he held her hips in place.

"I want this. I…I want _you_," he whispered, reaching to touch her bare skin once more. Filled with emotion, Gwyn crushed her mouth against his, carefully inching forward until she had slid down onto him. Moans escaped from both of their mouths as Cullen held onto her hips, his fingers leaving half-moon patterns in her skin.

The first movements of her grinding against him and the bucking of his hips were awkward at first, but they settled into a rhythm that worked between them. One of Cullen's hands left her hip to massage on her breasts, the pad of his thumb gently moving over her nipples. She sucked in a breath, opening her bright blue eyes to meet his amber gaze. One of her own hands traveled to her heat, carefully creating small circles until Cullen stopped her.

"Allow me," he whispered. His fingers took her place, continuing lazy circles while his other hand traveled over her back, then the curves of her hips and bottom. At every movement of his, she gasped and felt shocks of electricity surge through her. The pace between them quickened, deep movements within her that elicited moans from the two of them. His hands wrapped around her back, rolling her so that he was now above her. "Maker, you're beautiful," he whispered, breathless as his hips rocked against her. She grinded against him, wanting the sensation of every thrust inside of her to last. She sucked in a breath from the pain of the burn on her back, adjusting herself slightly. Her legs wrapped around his waist and he leaned forward, pausing to kiss her parted lips. His hopes were that every movement expressed what he couldn't bring himself to say aloud yet: _I've missed you. I love you. _

He adjusted his position slightly, bringing himself to his knees and lifting her hips just enough that he brushed against the sensitive spot with her. He'd move harder and faster, her name leaving his lips like a prayer. This fierce woman, whom he had seen take down demon after demon with simple flicks of her wrists, moaned under him after every thrust. His breathing ragged, Cullen hands gripped her hips tightly, his nails digging into her soft skin.

"Oh, Maker…don't stop," Gwyn panted, her hand reaching for his face. Her legs still wrapped around him, he pulled her into a sitting position and crushed his mouth to hers once more. One of his arms supported her, held onto the small of her back, while the other hand wound tightly in her long, brown hair—still damp from the rain. He watched her face, her blue eyes practically pleading with him. She pulled herself closer to him, her breasts pressing against him, her fingers entangling themselves in his hair. She nibbled on his neck as her legs tightened around him. She felt her stomach constrict as pleasure mounted into this wonderful ache inside of her.

"I love you." The words left her lips as her muscles tightened around him, her fingernails digging in Cullen's skin. She cried out at her release, sending him following after her. After gently lowering her to her back once more, Cullen collapsed limply on top of her. He buried his face next to her neck, planting a kiss that caused a small giggle to rise from Gwyn's throat. He looked down at her, her eyes adoring, an unabashedly happy grin spreading over his face just by the pure joy he felt having her in his life, in his arms.

"I love you," she repeated, the pad of her thumb running over the scar on his lip.

"And I love you," he whispered, kissing her temple. Once he said it, he found himself repeating it over and over after peppering kisses from her eyelids, to her cheeks, and then her lips, causing Gwyn's heart to flutter each time the words left his lips. He meant it, every word. Blissful silence fell between them as Cullen rolled onto his back. His hand reached for hers, their fingers weaving together as they both looked up the night's sky displayed from the hole in his quarters.

"I missed you, y'know that, right?" He rolled over to face her, his fingers cupping her face.

"Clearly," she smirked, moving closer to him. "I promise not to stay away for too long next time I journey away from Skyhold."

"Maybe no dragons next time?" He asked, pulling her into the crook of his arm and lazily tracing patterns over her stomach.

"No promises," she laughed.


End file.
